Communicating In Crisis

This course is currently in open enrollment. Enrollment is open until September 18th at 9 PM, at which time you will be unable to enroll in the course.

About This Course

"I love my child, but sometimes I feel like I'm failing them. No matter what I try, nothing seems to work when they're overwhelmed and in crisis mode."

For parents and caregivers of people on the autism spectrum, communication during moments of intense conflict and crisis can feel like an impossible task. At the heart of these crises is what we often call a "Neuro-Crash" (a term coined by Raun Kaufman and Kate C. Wilde) -which is an extreme manifestation of Defense Mode where the stress of a situation overwhelms your loved one's brain, causing their coping mechanisms to completely shut down. This results in explosive or out-of-control behaviors that may look like anger, defiance, or a meltdown on the outside, but actually represent a state of intense overwhelm, fear, and dysregulation on the inside.

Understanding Neuro-Crashes and how to prevent, manage, and recover from them is crucial to effectively supporting your loved one on the spectrum. This course is designed to provide you with a deep understanding of what's really happening during these challenging moments, and equip you with practical, effective strategies to navigate through the storm.

By the end of this course, you'll have a comprehensive, step-by-step roadmap to effectively handle even the most intense crisis situations with your loved one on the spectrum. You'll know exactly how to recognize the early signs of a Neuro Crash, how to respond effectively in the moment of crisis, and how to address bad behavior while rebuilding trust and connection afterwards. No more feeling helpless, confused, or afraid of saying the wrong thing. So if you're ready to break free from the endless cycle of fighting and arguments, repair your relationship, and help your loved one thrive, you're in the right place. It's time to move from surviving to thriving, and we'll show you exactly how to get there.

This 8-part course is a hybrid of both live & recorded material, designed for parents & caregivers of people on the autistic spectrum (diagnosed or not). Starting as soon as you enroll, you'll get access 8 weeks worth of recorded lessons & discussion, that covers both the high level strategy & theory, as well as practical nuts & bolts examples, situations & word-for-word scripts, so that you know exactly what to do and how to do it. Feel free to go through the lessons at your own pace, you'll have access to them for life.

Then, every Monday at 2:00 PM Pacific Time (5:00 PM Eastern Time) and every Wednesday at 5:00 PM Pacific Time (8:00 PM Eastern Time) for next 8 weeks, you'll have the opportunity to participate in a live Q&A phone session with your fellow students and the AE Staff. This is your chance to get some personalized coaching, clarification and help with your specific challenges as well as learn from others. We'll send you the full recording of those calls once they are completed.

Includes Group Phone Consults Twice Weekly

For 8 weeks after you purchase the course, you'll get access to our twice weekly question and answer consultation sessions with the AE Staff. This is your chance to get clarification, help with your specific challenges and learn from others. We'll send out the recording to those calls once they are completed.

These calls happen every Monday at 2:00 PM Pacific Time (5:00 PM Eastern Time) and every Wednesday at 5:00 PM Pacific Time (8:00 PM Eastern Time)

About Asperger Experts

The people at Asperger Experts, who co-created this course (along with Raun Kaufman and Kate C. Wilde), are the world's largest organization by & for individuals & families on the Autism spectrum. Every day they help thousands of families, teens, young adults & professionals navigate the complex world of Asperger's & Autism with real, first-person accounts & advice from people who've actually lived it and are diagnosed with Asperger's themselves.

In This Course, You'll Learn About...

The Tunnel Vision Effect

Understand why, during a neuro crash, your loved one can't "just let it go," and learn strategies to help them broaden their perspective when they're stuck in a single-minded focus.

Strategic Conversation Resets

Discover how to course-correct conversations that have gone off track, mending emotional wounds and steering interactions back to safety.

The SOS Checklist

Spot your loved one's unique stress signals so you can detect rising tension early and take action before things spiral out of control.

Co-Creating Effective Accountability Plans

Master the art of developing mutually agreed-upon strategies that answer "who does what by when, and what happens if," fostering commitment and follow-through.

Communicating Boundaries with Clarity

Learn how to explain your boundaries ahead of time, clearly sharing your reasons in a way that reduces resistance and fosters understanding.

Who Is This Class For?

Great For...

Parents, professionals, caregivers, and extended family of autistic individuals who want to reduce meltdowns and improve communication.

Anyone seeking to build stronger, more resilient relationships with their autistic loved ones

Not So Great For...

Young adults on the spectrum (this course speaks to parents).

Parents who aren't willing to examine their own habits & beliefs.

Class Curriculum

Part 1: Understanding Defense Mode, Neuro Crashes, and Global Buildup

"Why does my child explode over seemingly small things one moment, then seem fine the next? It feels like I'm constantly walking on eggshells, and it's so unpredictable."

In this crucial section, we'll dive deep into the root causes of challenging behaviors in individuals with autism. You'll gain a thorough understanding of defense mode, neuro crashes, and the global buildup that leads to them. We'll explore the biological and psychological processes behind these phenomena, helping you understand why traditional approaches often fall short.

Topics Include:

The Tunnel Vision Effect

Understand why, during a neuro crash, your loved one can't "just let it go," and learn strategies to help them broaden their perspective when they're stuck in a single-minded focus.

The Battery Problem

Understand why individuals on the autism spectrum often start their day with a lower "emotional battery charge," and how this affects their ability to cope with daily stressors.

The Coping Mechanism Paradox

Understand why well-intentioned efforts to redirect or "improve" your loved one's behaviors may actually be dismantling their crucial self-regulation strategies, inadvertently hastening a neuro-crash.

The Myth of the "Out of the Blue" Meltdown

Learn why neuro-crashes are never truly sudden, and how understanding the buildup process can help you prevent crises before they occur.

Part 2: Understanding Conflict and Shifting Perspectives

"Why does every disagreement seem to spiral out of control? It feels like we're constantly butting heads."

Here we'll explore why conflicts escalate and how changing our approach can transform heated arguments into opportunities for growth and understanding. You'll learn about different conflict management styles, the importance of self-reflection, and how to shift your perspective to create positive change.

Topics Include:

The Selective Attention Trap

Uncover how your focus during conflicts can blind you to crucial information, and learn a practical exercise to broaden your awareness.

Your Personal Conflict Compass

Identify your instinctive conflict reactions and gain practical strategies to navigate disagreements more effectively.

From Reaction to Response

Learn a practical exercise to transform your gut reactions into thoughtful, constructive responses during heated moments.

Part 3: Soothing Techniques for Crisis Communication

"How can I stay calm when my loved one is in the middle of a meltdown? It feels impossible not to react."

In this crucial section, we explore practical techniques to help you remain a calm, soothing presence during your loved one's neuro crash. You'll learn how to ground yourself, listen effectively, and create an environment that facilitates faster recovery from crisis moments. These skills will empower you to respond rather than react, fostering a safer space for your loved one.

Topics Include:

The Five-Finger Breath Technique

Master a simple yet powerful breathing exercise that can quickly lower your heart rate and stress levels, even in the midst of chaos.

The Art of Active Silence

Discover how strategic moments of silence can create a powerful space for your loved one to self-regulate and feel truly heard.

The Anxiety-Embracing Touch

Learn a quick self-soothing technique that allows you to acknowledge and befriend your own anxiety, creating inner calm amidst external chaos.

Part 4: Advanced Communication Techniques

"I try to stay calm, but it feels like nothing I say or do makes a difference. How can I communicate effectively when emotions are running high?"

We go deeper into advanced communication & soothing strategies to help you navigate intense emotional situations. You'll learn powerful techniques to express support, validate feelings, and steer conversations towards resolution, even in the midst of a crisis. These tools will empower you to maintain connection and foster understanding when it matters most.

Topics Include:

The Power of Mirroring

Master a simple yet profound technique that instantly makes your loved one feel heard and understood, encouraging them to open up further.

Sense Mode Statements

Learn how to use observational language that validates emotions without escalating conflict, helping to defuse tense situations.

Strategic Conversation Resets

Discover how to course-correct conversations that have gone off track, mending emotional wounds and steering interactions back to safety.

Part 5: Backing Off and Detecting Signals of Stress

"How can I tell when a meltdown is coming, and what should I do when I can't seem to calm my loved one down?"

We'll explore the process of backing off and the importance of recognizing early warning signs of stress. You'll learn when and how to create space for your loved one to self-regulate, as well as how to spot subtle signals that indicate rising tension, which will empower you to prevent crises BEFORE they escalate.

Topics Include:

The Four Steps of Backing Off

Learn a practical sequence for stepping back, giving your loved one space to self-regulate while balancing staying present and supportive.

Developing Socioception Skills

Learn to recognize subtle verbal and non-verbal cues that signal rising stress levels, allowing you to intervene before a full-blown crisis occurs.

The SOS Checklist

Spot your loved ones unique stress signals so you can detect rising tension early and take action before things spiral out of control.

Part 6: Building Strong, Resilient and Crisis-Proof Relationships

"How can I connect with my loved one when they seem to push me away? It feels like we're always at odds."

We'll explore tested, effective strategies for building deep, lasting trust with your loved one on the autism spectrum. You'll learn how to create a strong foundation for your relationship that can withstand the challenges of defense mode and neuro crashes. These techniques will help you foster a sense of safety and connection, even during difficult times.

Topics Include:

The Five Autism Love Languages

Learn how to communicate love in ways that your autistic loved one can truly feel and understand.

The Four Pillars of Trust

Learn a practical approach to building unshakeable trust, so that they feel safe enough to come to you even in times of Defense Mode or crisis.

Balancing Support and Independence

Discover how to show genuine interest in your loved one's world while respecting their need for space and autonomy.

Part 7: Setting Effective Boundaries

"How can I set limits without causing meltdowns? It feels like I'm always the bad guy."

This section covers how to establish and maintain healthy boundaries that create safety and predictability for your loved one on the spectrum. You'll learn how to set limits in a way that builds trust rather than resentment, and helps reduce the frequency of neuro crashes.

Topics Include:

Redefining Boundaries

Learn a powerful new approach to setting limits that focuses on what you will or won't do, rather than trying to control your loved one's behavior.

Balancing Control and Firmness

Discover how to give your loved one maximum control in most areas while maintaining firm boundaries in the few critical ones, creating a sense of freedom and safety.

Communicating Boundaries with Clarity

Learn how to explain your boundaries ahead of time, sharing your reasons in a way that reduces resistance and fostering understanding.

Part 8: Problem-Solving and Creating Lasting Change

"How can we prevent future meltdowns and create real, lasting change? It feels like we're stuck in an endless cycle."

In this final section, we explore strategies for identifying the root causes of challenging behaviors and creating effective plans for long-term change. You'll learn how to move beyond crisis management to proactively address underlying issues and build sustainable solutions. These techniques will empower you to break cycles of conflict and foster growth and independence in your loved one.

Topics Include:

The Five Capability Roadblocks

Learn to identify and address the key obstacles preventing your loved one from making progress, from emotional capacity to time management.

Co-Creating Effective Accountability Plans

Master the art of developing mutually agreed-upon strategies that answer "who does what by when, and what happens if," fostering commitment and follow-through.

The Independence Chunking Strategy

Master a practical technique for breaking down seemingly impossible tasks into manageable, achievable steps, allowing your loved one to build confidence and skills gradually.

Frequently Asked Questions

When does the course start?

The main course is on demand, and you'll get access for life as soon as you enroll. Q&A happens twice weekly, every Monday at 2:00 PM Pacific Time (5:00 PM Eastern Time) and every Wednesday at 5 PM Pacific Time (8:00 PM Eastern Time), and the recordings will be sent to you after.

What devices does the course work on?

We support all modern devices that can access the internet. So that's things like laptops, desktops, iPads & other tablets, smartphones, etc.

You are also welcome to download our free app from your App Store to access your courses and participate in community discussions. Just search "Asperger Experts".

Can I access the class on more than 1 device?

Absolutely. You can login to your account and access the class from any modern device (computer, laptop, tablet, smartphone, etc). You'll have lifetime access to the course materials.

Is this course for me or my children?

This class is designed for parents, caregivers & extended family. If you want your child to attend, they are welcome to, but you may also be interested in our co-occurring class specific for them, called "Relieving The Pressure"

What happens if I can't make the Q&A calls?

No problem! Just comment below a course lesson or email us at [email protected]. As a reminder, Q&A calls happen every Monday at 2:00 PM Pacific Time (5:00 PM Eastern Time) and every Wednesday at 5 PM Pacific Time (8:00 PM Eastern Time), and the recordings will be sent to you after.